"Do you really have to do this?"
Rong Dai walked out and looked at her, pulling out a tissue to hand to her.
It wasn't that she was deliberately eavesdropping, but the courtyard was so small, when Lu Nianzhi got agitated and angry, her voice was loud, it was hard not to hear.
Lu Nianzhi's eyes were red as she looked up at the sky, dabbing away her tears: "Am I really that much of a coward?"
"Or you can say I'm a hardcore assistant who can't even handle my own personal feelings."
Her tone was full of self-mockery.
Rong Dai looked at her and glanced at the time on her watch: "It's still early, shall we go to the cafe across the way?"
Lu Nianzhi didn't want to disturb her colleagues either in the office in her current emotional state, so she nodded, and the two of them went to the cafe and sat down.
Rong Dai wasn't actually here to drink coffee.
Lu Nianzhi was her right hand man. If she couldn't work properly, there were many things in the company that she wouldn't be able to cope with.
Although she had Shaoting, he also had to deal with all kinds of big and small matters of the Huo Group everyday.
Since the Wen family matter last time, the Huo second master's family had not made any moves, but that was even more worrying.
So to get Lu Nianzhi to work with peace of mind, regarding her and Mr. Xu's matter, she would help if she could.
"You still love Mr. Xu, don't you?"
Rong Dai put her phone aside, looked up at her and gently asked.
Lu Nianzhi was stunned for a moment, her unfocused gaze looking out the window at the scenery, stirring her coffee with her hand.
Probably seven or eight seconds later, she heavily replied: "Yes, I still love him."
"It's been five years, and I still can't forget him."
"He was the first man I loved. We used to have so many beautiful dreams about the future."
"I hate him!"
"I hate that he stabbed me so deeply, I hate that he shattered all those dreams into smithereens!"
"I also hate myself, why can't I just forget him?"
Lu Nianzhi's eyes were empty as she looked at Rong Dai. Whenever this matter was brought up, she would lose control of her emotions.
"But... I don't have the courage to start over with him again, yet I also don't have the courage to end it."
"I..."
Lu Nianzhi was in extreme agony. This torment felt just as painful as five years ago.
"I really... hate feeling so tormented and unable to forget someone. This feeling is worse than death!"
"Why does he have to show up again and disrupt my life? Why can't he just let me go..."
Lu Nianzhi was in utter anguish.
Scenes from five years ago flashed through her mind, frame by frame, like a movie replay.
Seeing her unleash her emotions, Rong Dai felt heartache but also relieved.
Being able to vent was better than keeping it bottled up inside.
She just hadn't expected that Lu Nianzhi had actually been on antidepressants for three years. Although she didn't know much about this illness in her past life, there were always news articles being pushed about it.
She had read one or two herself, and knew well the horror of depression.
No one could imagine how Lu Nianzhi had struggled through those three years, as if living a fate worse than death. So now when facing this matter again, she would still have such massive emotional turmoil.
The more adamant and beautiful something was, the more unbearable it was when it shattered.
