After Shen Wu unsuccessfully tried to kill the dog, he clearly felt that everyone in the family was avoiding him.
Except for big brother, the others didn't even want to talk to him.
Shen Wu was a little puzzled at first, but he didn't pay much attention to it for long. They were all unimportant people anyway, their attitude was irrelevant to him.
Just as big brother said, he had to start learning to live alone, he could live very well alone.
First of all, he just needed to find something he was interested in.
In order to find something like this, Shen Wu went to the study at home, intending to find some inspiration from books to see if there was anything he was interested in.
But when he got to the study, he found that someone else was already there, it was his fourth brother, Shen Jize.
Regarding this fourth brother, Shen Wu didn't know much about him, nor did he want to get to know him, so he ignored Shen Jize, whose gaze had fallen on him, and wandered around the study, searching for his nonexistent interest based on the titles of the books.
But after looking around, all the books were more or less the same, just like his current life, insipid and tasteless.
Just as Shen Wu was about to leave, his eyes suddenly caught sight of the "Human Anatomy" book on the top shelf.
Come to think of it, he only knew about a dog's structure now, but had never learned about humans.
If he knew what parts made up a human, wouldn't it be easier for him to understand what was happening to himself?
As Shen Wu thought this, he reached out to grab the book on the top shelf.
Unfortunately, he was still quite a bit short of reaching the top shelf, even when standing on a stool, he couldn't get that book.
Just as Shen Wu decided to give up, a very faint voice suddenly came from the side, still hesitant, "Which book did you want to get? I can help."
For some reason, Shen Wu heard every word Shen Jize said clearly, then he nodded.
Shen Jize continued softly, "Then you get down first, and I'll stand on the stool to help you get it."
Shen Jize was a little taller than Shen Wu, not much taller, but enough to get the book down. After getting the book, Shen Jize became serious instead, he cautiously extended his foot downwards, carefully getting off the stool until his feet touched the ground, then he breathed a sigh of relief.
Shen Wu felt that this fourth brother of his was very strange, his attitude towards him was different from others, but he didn't know exactly what was different.
When taking the book from Shen Jize's hands, Shen Wu felt like his nails had accidentally scraped something, at the same time, Shen Jize, who had been fine in front of him just now, suddenly burst into tears.
Shen Wu didn't understand.
But he thought that this fourth brother must dislike him like the others to cry like this, so he'd better leave quickly.
Just as Shen Wu had just lifted his foot to leave, he heard a choked voice behind him, "I'm sorry."
Shen Wu's footsteps halted.
According to his understanding, the words "I'm sorry" should not appear in this situation.
Based on his usual experience, Shen Jize should be shouting at him not to come over, or shouting at him to go away, that would make more sense.
So Shen Wu stopped, and asked Shen Jize, "Why are you saying sorry to me?"
Tears kept streaming down Shen Jize's face like a broken string of beads, but he still choked back sobs to answer Shen Wu intermittently, "I scared you by suddenly crying, but...I'm sorry, I can't control it either."
And it really hurts.
Shen Wu was stunned for a while, standing there holding the book for a good while, before saying, "I wasn't scared."
After saying this, the only sound left in the study was Shen Jize's crying.
Shen Wu just stood quietly to the side, not knowing what he was thinking about, until he saw the bead of blood that had gathered from the oozing wound on Shen Jize's finger drip down onto the floor, landing on the floorboards with a faint but crisp echo, before he came to his senses and awkwardly asked the maid for a first aid kit, then returned to the study.
Shen Jize was still crying.
Shen Wu thought that he had also wanted to cry before, but he had suppressed it quickly, so he went over to Shen Jize's side, and passed on his experience to him, "You can ask yourself if there's anything worth crying over, then you'll find there isn't anything worth crying over."
Shen Wu's inexplicable words successfully made Shen Jize stop crying for 2 seconds, then the tears couldn't help but continue to fall.
Shen Wu was silent for a moment, realizing that not everyone could stop crying with this method, he could only shut his mouth and start helping Shen Jize stop the bleeding in silence.
The wound on Shen Jize's hand was actually very small, it was just a minor cut caused by his scratched skin from the nail just now. Normally speaking, even if left alone, it would be fine.
Shen Wu didn't know why, from the moment he saw that insignificant cut gradually ooze enough blood to drip down, he felt like he couldn't just leave it alone.
But all he could do was take a medicated bandage and stick it on Shen Jize's wound.
"Thank you."
Shen Wu stayed there for a while longer until Shen Jize had completely stopped crying before leaving.
In the following week, Shen Wu finished reading that anatomy book, and ran into the fourth brother again when he went to the study room.
This time, he was crying again.
Shen Wu walked past with indifference, randomly putting down the book in his hand, then started looking for something else that might interest him.
He didn't expect Shen Jize to talk to him.
"Are you also hiding here?"
"No, I just came to find a book."
After that, Shen Wu didn't hear Shen Jize speak again until he found another book and was about to leave, then he heard Shen Jize's sighing soliloquy, "I wish I could be like you."
Be like me? Why?
Shen Wu felt that his life was not worth looking forward to.
"Why?" Shen Wu wanted to know the answer, the reason why Shen Jize wished for that.
"I think you're very strong, even when upset and in pain you don't show it, but I can't do that, I'll always cry, I can't stand it, so no one wants to get close to me."
It seemed that Shen Jize didn't need an answer either, he just muttered to himself, "If I could control myself, maybe I wouldn't be so disliked."
Only then did Shen Wu understand that it wasn't that he wasn't interested in anything, but rather that he didn't dare to be.
He became strong and wanted to live alone as big brother had told him, so he had restrained himself, restrained everything.
"I'm sorry, did I disturb you, you don't have to mind me..."
"Fourth brother."
Shen Wu cut off Shen Jize's apology, and suddenly said to him, "I saw in the book that everyone has things they are good and bad at. Since you're not good at restraining yourself, don't force it."
Shen Wu meant well, but he didn't know if it was because his tone and expression were too cold, it made Shen Jize feel like he was being sarcastic instead, and unable to hold back, cried again.
Seeing Shen Jize shedding tears, Shen Wu didn't know what to do, he could only stand there watching until Shen Jize stopped crying before leaving.
