August 6, Tuesday.
Cloudy turning sunny.
She has tutoring work this afternoon, so she did not make a swimming date.
Wu Peirong originally felt time was tight and they should practice every day, but seeing Xiaoqi really working hard and taking the initiative, she was instead worried that this student was overdoing it, too tense, and would not perform well on the day of the competition. So she also agreed to let her rest.
Yesterday she received the photos Xiaoqi took of her and really liked them. She posted them on Moments and received many likes and compliments. Wu Peirong was in a very good mood all day.
Having no need to go swimming practice early in the morning, Xiaoqi got up, planning to go for a morning run.
Over the past few days her biological clock has adjusted. She woke up at 5:30, before dawn.
The sky doesn't get light until 7.
But she could already hear sounds from next door by 5:30. Her neighbor Lin Min's mom sells breakfast and gets up very early. Xiaoqi thought it strange not having seen Lin Min these past two days. Later she heard from Lin Qingqing that her brother went out of town with friends.
After getting up she went to wash up first, said hello to Lin Min's mom, who was packing things in the yard.
Then she went back to her room, soaked the rice—she found that soaking rice for half an hour before cooking makes it taste better.
After soaking the rice, she started practicing her calligraphy, copying over text from her reader.
The copybook she borrowed—she had started the fifth round of transcription. She had the contents memorized basically just glancing at it occasionally.
As for New Concept English Book Four, she has been gnawing at it the past couple days. It’s still quite difficult, so she copies that over too, finding that copying aids memorization.
Her calligraphy is still beginner-level, but looking ahead, she can see the time to reach intermediate level dropping (27/100). Being able to see measurable progress makes her feel she is learning a lot. Xiaoqi really likes this aspect of the system. She was always a diligent student before, grades in the middle-upper level of her class, but always felt a sense that despite her hard work, she didn’t know if it was paying off, if her efforts were directionless, a bit muddled.
Thinking back now, besides the lack of quantifiable measures, she really just didn’t try hard enough.
In the final stretch before the Gaokao, she did problems every day to the point of exhaustion, sometimes plowing away until 1 or 2am, but her efficiency was low. She was just doing problems for the sake of it without noticeable improvement.
Sleeping so little, she had trouble getting up in the mornings, which was when she would have been most clear-headed. Sitting still and only using her brain all day, she often felt sleepy. So while it looked like she was trying hard, her efficiency was low.
But coming to these realizations, while belated, is not late.
Xiaoqi practiced calligraphy for half an hour, copied English for half an hour, put the congee on, changed into track pants and a loose tee, grabbed her phone headphones, opened an English podcast on Ximalaya, and set out on her morning run.
She felt running has been a bit hard on her shoes the past couple days. The cloth shoes she wears daily have worn down considerably already. Not suited for running, she plans to buy herself a pair of sneakers today.
There is already over 30k yuan in her interface money again. Su Xiaoqi feels much calmer about it now, no longer has the urge to immediately spend it and buy things. Lately she hasn't had the thought to buy herself clothes or anything.
Her current shoes really won’t do, so she has to buy new ones. Her school is a key high school, enrollment mainly based on grades, but there is quite intense comparatives going on, especially with shoes—since their uniforms are standardized, shoes bought individually are a visible mark of differentiation.
She heard from Xia Zhen that Liu Shaowei’s shoes are expensive, called AJs or something, supposedly several thousand yuan, even over ten thousand she heard, unbelievable extravagance she has no concept of and dares not explore that other world.
While running, Xiaoqi does not think about such things.
The morning air is slightly cool, breathing more comfortable. The wind in her ears stronger, the track more empty, the morning world quieter. But after Xiaoqi had been running for a while, gradually more people trickled in—various music playing, groups arriving to square dance, multiple groups at each track, loud music clashing and blending. Xiaoqi had to turn her earphones up over the interference.
Indeed there is some bewitching quality to square dancing music—after hearing it a few times, one cannot help but sing and dance along.
Xiaoqi persisted running for an hour. Around 7:30 she headed back.
Running is still greatly efficient—over 10k steps in one hour.
But she was still a bit tired by the end. Having to compete with the music, attention wavering.
Xiaoqi slowed to a walk on her way back, sweaty body meeting the slight morning chill. Fortunately the sun has risen higher now.
August is not cold yet.
Back inside she still had to use the ward bathrooms to shower. Using ward bathrooms in the morning is a bit inconvenient actually, since patients wake early to prep for rounds. Her aunt arranged an empty room for her, but going there to shower really makes her feel like she entered a movie scene, wandering between vacant hospital rooms, coming and going, not knowing who is supposed to be housed where.
After showering, the congee had finished cooking. Her aunt prepared side dishes and steamed buns.
She seemed to be eating less, no oil. Somewhat listless.
"Not feeling well?"
"I got tired swimming yesterday, lost 5 jin.” A smile broke through Su Simei’s weary face as she talked about this.
She did feel tired coming back last night, having also taken a home care job that had her up multiple times at night. Usually she would have a midnight snack, but seeing the scale drop and thinking to keep it that way, she didn’t eat. Her stomach rumbled all night. Today she looks low energy.
She figures this is the last month to take the home care job. The measly extra income she directs to her daughter who never visits.
She wouldn’t have thought this way normally, but living with her niece recently, seeing her study and exercise busily with no time to spend money, while attending Number One High without any apparent need for constant purchases made her reconsider. Whereas her daughter Feifei in middle school still gets spoiled by her father despite abandonment, showing up designer clad without ever working for what she has, unlike her niece. Witnessing the contrast daily in their shared habitat, something has felt off-kilter. Her extra money directed toward Feifei does not seem to engender good. She has consistently heard Feifei’s grades are poor.
Su Simei was called back upstairs shortly after eating, the morning usual busy shift beginning.
Xiaoqi washed the dishes.
While washing, she suddenly heard the mechanical voice sound in her ear, “Host subtly transforming outlook of mildly depressed middle aged woman with binge eating disorder, alleviating her depression and binge eating, bringing her forward looking positivity and motivation for self-improvement, rewarding host with 1 cm height increase. Congenitally quite short by human standards, host’s efforts shall continue.”
Xiaoqi: ......
